Yippee Theatre's hilarious immersive drag panto 'Dead Hard' sees Nakablowmi Tower taken over by Hands Grubber and his team of butch henchmen.
Photo: Yippee Theatre
Dead Hard, the debut production from Yippee Theatre, mixes adult panto, drag, parody, and immersive theatre. Written by Lowell Belfield and Helena Raeburn, alongside the show's director, Bertie Watkins, the show is chock full of double-ended dildos, double entendre, and is easily one of the funniest shows we've seen in years.
Photo: Yippee Theatre
The opening 20 minutes of Dead Hard see the audience split in half, with them either ushered to the 32nd floor of Nakablowmi Towers to take part in a series of X-rated party games or being enlisted to help with Hands Grubber's imminent storming of the building on the ground floor.
During our visit, we were escorted up to the 32nd floor and welcomed by Joe Capitalism (Jacqui Bardelang), whose invitation to "watch them do a massive line of blow" immediately sets the tone for the office party gone wrong. With kilos of cocaine both laid out on a boardroom table and filling up a paddling pool, as well as dildos suction-cupped onto the glass partition dividing the space. It's an audacious opening to a show, which is made all the more outrageous by a party game in which an audience member needs to keep a huge dildo balanced upright in their hand for as long as possible, and a game involving champagne bottles and string that required some very precise hip movements to win.
If it wasn't already clear, Dead Hard has a wonderfully chaotic energy to it. The campness is turned up to 11 right from the start, and every moment that references John McTiernan's original film has been injected with a huge amount of innuendo and humour.
Photo: Yippee Theatre
For those on the building's top floor, there are fleeting visits from gym-bro John McClean (Alex Dowding), fresh off a flight from New York City, and their disgruntled ex-wife Holly (Calum Robshaw) in the opening act, which sees Holly burst in as John is being stripped down to his vest and without socks and shoes, soundtracked by Magic Mike staple 'Pony' by Ginuwine. We can't speak to what those recruited by Grubber many floors below have been up to, but our paths soon intercept in suitably dramatic fashion.
CEO Joe's plans for everyone to gather around for a company photo are interrupted as the doors to the party burst open and the show's villain, Hands Grubber (Toby Osmond), decked out in a sequin outfit and high heels, enters flanked by the other half of the audience, who usher everyone into the show's main performance space. "You will witness the greatest corporate spanking in history" decrees Grubber as we take our seats.
Once inside this main performance space, Dead Hard becomes a more traditional panto, with the audience sat on either side of the central stage for the remainder of the show. The scenes that follow include everything you'd expect from a Christmas pantomime - from screams of 'He's behind you!' to regular booing from the audience and a heap of costume changes.
The show's mature tone allows the cast to fully lean into the adult nature of the show's script. Guns have been replaced with dildos that vibrate instead of fire; a sex doll substitutes for the film's many dead terrorists, and Hands' name is mined for every joke you could probably ever think up about handjobs. There are numerous references to RuPaul's Drag Race, Grindr, and even the recent assassination of the UnitedHealthcare CEO is incorporated into the show's script, which is both a non-stop barrage of jokes and a celebration of queer culture.
Photo: Yippee Theatre
By design, pantos are interactive, and the audience plays an important role in the proceedings. You can expect regular questions asked to the crowd, and every emotional moment is played for a reaction - whether it be a sympathetic aww, a boo or a cheer. Toby Osmond's Hands, in particular, will play up to the crowd at every given opportunity, lapping up their booing with delight while goading them to continue.
While some of Die Hard's most iconic moments, including John crawling through the vents of Nakatomi Plaza, are recreated throughout the show with ingenious creativity, and scenes later on in which the cast chase each other on go-karts take the absurdity of the show to ever greater heights, there's real heart at the centre of Dead Hard. The personal journey that John McClean goes on throughout the show, in which they grapple with their own sexuality, adds emotional weight to the show's climax and recontextualises the original film's bromance between McClane and Powell to be an out-and-out love story.
Without a doubt, Dead Hard is one of the funniest shows we've seen in years. You'd struggle to find a more entertaining night out in London this Christmas season, even if it's light on proper immersive elements outside of the first act. It's a Yippee-Ki-Yaas from us.
★★★★
Dead Hard: A Drag Die Hard Parody Panto runs at COLAB Tower from 10th December 2024 to 12th January 2025. Tickets are priced from £32 and can be booked via colabtheatre.co.uk
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